It’s time to stop the hurting

When was the last time you hurt someone? Maybe you had a misunderstanding with someone and hurt their feelings or went too far and hurt them physically. Did you say to yourself “serves them right, they had it coming” or did you feel awful?

Disagreements, arguments and conflicts can sometimes get us into trouble when with or without intention we act in ways that hurt ourselves or another. Why do we lose control, feel overcome by our emotions and at times even feel good when we hurt those we love? What is really going on when we choose to hurt others?

Our reactions to our hurtful behavior can run the gamut. We can feel justified or shame and at times deep remorse. We may even vow that we will never do it again.

We may find it easy to justify hurting people who we don’t know or who are different that ourselves but what about the pain we cause those we say we love? There’s not a week goes by where we don’t hear on tv or in print the bazaar details of love gone bad. A once happily married couple has come to an end because they have repeatedly criticized and hurt each other.

We sit and watch with mixed emotions wondering how something so good could end up so bad. Whether it’s a simple misunderstanding or years of physical and emotional abuse we know it is something we all wrestle with regardless of age, color, sex or nationality.

It happens to each of us and will happen again. The only way to understand the times you hurt someone is to begin to see what is really going on. You begin to do this by taking 100% responsibility for each experience. At the core of your hurtful behavior is not what you think.

Our passion at I AM DISCOVERED is to help you know yourself. When you are able to see your motivations, intentions, choices and actions you have a greater capacity to act with love as well as bring a deeper understanding to why people act the way they do.

The Discovery experience will show you how hurtfulness can be experienced in a whole new way. Insight into these motivations can increase your influence allowing you to get ahead of the actions which may cause hurtful encounters. We can’t wait to show you. Begin by clicking on the link Start Now and take control of your life.

Once you have completed the Discovery you can further your learning on this subject by exploring how these additional Mentoring Feedbacks will enhance how you see yourself and others.


Below you will find a description of these six relevant Mentoring sessions. They are well worth exploring if understanding yourself in relationships is important to you.

When was the last time you hurt someone? Maybe you had a misunderstanding with someone and hurt their feelings or went too far and hurt them physically. Did you say to yourself “serves them right, they had it coming” or did you feel awful?

BOUNDARIES – Self Definition and Self Care
It’s all about you. If you aren’t healthy, then it is practically impossible
to give to someone else. Your Feedback coach wants to talk to you about what you need to know about yourself, how you need to think
about yourself and how you fit into the world around you. One of the most difficult dynamics to manage is determining where your sphere of influence should start and end and what it means for you to have healthy and responsible boundaries. Boundaries give you shape and define how you fit in time and space. To have form you must have boundaries. To be successful once you understand what it is you do, you must learn when and how to master yourself and withhold your gift or use your gift to make room for others to do what it is they do. This Feedback session will change the way you understand self care and influence.

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY™ we will review again what makes you uniquely you and how some of those very motivations get you in trouble with the people in your life. We will look at the different ways people can mis-understand you and what you can do to help them see and hear you. We will discuss strategies on managing yourself and
show you how to get the most out of what you do by learning to do it in ways that better serve you and those you live and work with.

What You Will Learn
We have discovered one of the critical ingredients often found in healthy, satisfying lives is the skill of setting boundaries. We will help you uncover ways to maximize your boundaries so you can learn to take better care of yourself. Next to self awareness, self mastery is the next most vital skill.

CONFLICT- Resolving Your Differences With Others
Sometimes you have to wrestle with life. It’s not always easy. Day in and day out you face potential conflicts with everyone around you. From managers and colleagues to family members and friends. From your most intimate partner to the stranger next to you in a traffic jam. Sometimes it’s not a person but unmet expectations or an unrealized dream that leaves you struggling to make sense of what you should do next.

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY™ your coach will talk about situations that cause you the most conflict. All conflict begins with your perception of what is good and bad right and wrong and within your influence and control. Fully understanding your natural tendencies that come into play will help you develop a more peaceful, harmonious
approach to conflict resolution.

What You Will Learn
We understand that conflict has the potential to disconnect you from work and from the people you love. We will explore ways you can stay connected to the areas of your life that matter most even as you use your skills to solve problems. Determine with this coaching session to see how your natural tendencies get you into trouble as well as how they can lead you through.

EMOTIONS – Harnessing Your Energy
Some people wear them on their sleeve. Some people bury them deep inside. Some feel totally in control while others feel their emotions are like a runaway train. Your Feedback coach wants to talk to you about what you feel. What you will learn may surprise you. Rarely do you have any concern when you experience what we call the positive feelings, happiness, love and excitement for example. When you feel the emotions of fear, anger, sadness or guilt is when you may begin to squirm a bit or block them out all together. You deserve to be the master of your emotional self and this coaching session will set you on course to do just that.

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY™ your Feedback coach will talk about what affects you. We will help you understand what situations invigorate you and which ones drive you crazy. You may not realize that your very design is what drives how you see the world and define problems to begin with. We are excited about showing you ways to navigate your emotional world and take 100% responsibility for everything you think and feel.

What You Will Learn
We have discovered that your emotions are largely controlled by how successfully you are able to do what it is you have been designed to do. We will help you take control of this vital component of your life. Learning to manage your emotions may be one of the most important skills you need to acquire and there is no better place to begin understanding than with this coaching session on Emotions.

FAMILY – Sharing Life In Community
Everyone has a family. At any moment one out of six workers are pre-occupied to the point of distraction with something that is not working at home. The demands on you relationally and personally can be so intense that sometimes they make the rest of life pale in comparison. You need to take your family seriously.

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY your Feedback coach will talk with you about what family means to you. We will review the roles that you
are expected to fill and explore which ones may or may not come naturally to you. We will discuss what you need from your family and how you can get it.

What You Will Learn
We have discovered that more people have been disappointed by their family then in any other single area. We will talk about how you recover from past negative experiences and what you can do to build a successful future with a family that works and reflects the values you hold most dear.

GROWTH – Becoming Better
Deepening Your Learning. Getting better at what you do.
You are on a journey that lasts a lifetime. When you were younger,the growth seemed measurable and was often orchestrated by some one else. Your parents, your teachers, your boss. Did anyone know you and understand how your natural abilities most impact your ability to grow and develop? Probably not. Like most you were thrust into subjects and learning styles that were convenient to the teacher or important to someone else. Now it is your turn to understand how you best grow and development and never again subject to a personal growth model that is foreign to your very essence. In this coaching session your Feedback coach wants to show you how to chart a path for personal growth that helps you get a little better at what you do each and every day but be crafted from a framework of how you best learn.

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY we will talk about how you grow. We will look at the stages that await you in your unique life journey
and show you how you can prepare to take them on. We will talk about which obstacles block your growth and how you can build pathways around them.

What You Will Learn
We have discovered that many people stop getting better at what they do as they reach the mid-point of their life. Rather than experiencing life as an opportunity they begin to see life as their enemy. We want to enable you to grow by showing you how to embrace your life as the unique and personal adventure it truly is.

RELATIONSHIPS – Connections That Work
Everybody is a people person. Everybody does what it is they do in relationship to others even if what they do the best they do with no one else around. Your I AM Discovered Feedback™ coach will help you define the sweet spot of your relationship style and how you work best with people. Everyone operates on a continuum from the desire for solitude on the one end and connection on the other. Knowing where you most naturally like to play on that continuum can be invaluable information as you maneuver through the relationships from the most causal acquaintance to the most intimate relational partner. From family members to business associates and colleagues knowing how you see and think about people is a must. Clients tell us this one coaching session along gave them tremendous permission to stop hating themselves for the way they naturally do relationships but instead experience heightened insight and skill to begin to share and explain how they best interact with others

What You Will Hear
Using the language of your DISCOVERY™ your Feedback coach will talk about how you work and live in relationship to other people. We will look at
how people need to be positioned around you for you to be at your best. We will explore what is happening when people drive you crazy.

What You Will Learn
We have discovered that being able to make sense of the people and things around you can improve the way you live. Who doesn’t want life to be better? We will help you develop respect for the differences of others and show you ways to honor their personal space. When you have completed this one single feedback session you will know how to take 100% responsibility for every relationship and will be empowered with a new paradigm to create dynamic relationships that work. Finally you will know new ways to strengthen those relationships that are most important to you.